Taking Care of Business

“Do you want to brush your teeth?” I ask her, half hoping she’ll say no. “Yes, honey, but I don’t have a toothbrush here.” Oh, no. Please don’t start that. “What do you mean? Of course you have one. There it is.” I point to her toothbrush. “Oh, that one. Yes, I forgot, I guess.” I hope it ends there, because I really don’t want to hear about her not knowing where she is or thinking she’s not in her own home. That always wigs me out. Like I’m suddenly in the Twilight Zone. The toothbrush thing is new. I wonder what’s caused it. Maybe it’s because we’re brushing less.

I have to admit I’m not real gung ho about hygiene. I know that sounds awful. I’m embarrassed to admit it—but I bet there are a lot of people like me out there who just don’t admit it. I do take care of things, but perhaps just not as religiously or as joyfully as others. I hate to get wet, for one thing. I hate having wet hair. I hate taking the time to brush my teeth, much less to floss. I never can remember to put on deodorant—because I don’t smell. At least, I can’t smell me. So getting another person to do these things, especially a reluctant 93-year-old who just feels too tired to mess with it, is not exactly up my alley. Luckily, Mary has taught me a thing or two. For instance, she always swishes with some water after she eats and she flosses while she watches TV. (I’ve started doing it while she’s on the potty!) As a result, she still has most of her teeth. She always says, “Your eyes and your teeth are precious.”

She also always washes her hands before she eats or deals with food, and she never puts her fingers in her mouth when she’s cooking. Oddly enough, although she rarely blows her nose, she does dab at it constantly and keeps her tissues tucked everywhere from up her sleeves to in her pockets to in the cushions of all the chairs she sits in. Maybe that’s why she insists on washing her hands so much!

Well, I’m quite tuckered out today and we’ve got a big day ahead of us tomorrow. (Every time we go out, when we return Mary will say, “Well, we’ve had a big day today.” Sometimes when we pull in the garage she’ll say, “Home again, home again, jiggety-jig.” I don’t know where she got that.) We’re going to Lexington to have lunch with some of my friends from there whom I haven’t seen for a few months. She loves to take day trips. I also want to get some tea (Ceylon) from a nice place there. I can’t wait to have some good tea again!

PS--I didn't put a hot "bean bag" in Mary's bed recently and her reaction was so hilarious! She put her feet under her covers so expectantly and then... the most incredible cresfallen look! Like a child who comes rushing into the living room on Christmas morning to find no presents under the tree. "Oh, I ain't got no bean bag!" she exclaimed with the most perfect innocence. I felt so awful. Like I'd betrayed her or something. I joked that I didn't want to spoil her too much, but her disappointment was so sincere, I'll definitely have to try to make sure that she's got a hot one when she gets into bed.